Gadgets and Gizmos

On our trip to California I picked up one of those SkyMall Catalogs because I saw something that was completely ridiculous. After browsing the catalog, I now know that there are more gadgets and gizmos that I think are just terrible and some that are just awesome. I'll list a few of the worst ones here (in no particular order):

SO ABSURD GADGETS
1. iWear AV230 and iWear for iPod. "These are personal and portable 44" big-screen displays that are worn like sunglasses..."

These are ridiculous in the idea that a person can't go ANYWHERE without being plugged in. Personal DVD players are bad enough, but to take yourself out of the world so far in that you are the only person experiencing what you are seeing is crazy. People these days are more lonely than ever before. Is it any wonder?

2. Sharper Image "Now You Can Find It!" Wireless Electronic Locater. "'Now You Can Find It!' includes eight RF receiver discs that beep and flash to help you quickly locate a missing object. Attach one of eight beeper discs to elusive items like your TV remote or your child's favorite toy..."

OK, so not as ridiculous as 1, I can't imagine having 8 things to keep track of (unless you can somehow attach them to kids in a toy store). 4 things maybe... but not 8. The idea about attaching it to your kids' toys (or blankies) is great. That would be the real good thing about this invention. I'm not so keen on putting it on remotes. Worse case scenario, you get up and go switch the channel by hand (although I am sure some people would just rather not watch TV at all at that point) or just turn the dumb thing off. I'm sure my views will change when my remotes start getting up and walking away (or my child carries them away and hides them), but for the meanwhile, I'm content finding things on my own without a $49.95 gadget to help.

3. Alcohawk ABI Blood Alcohol Content Breath Screener. "This professional grade ABI (Alocohol Breath Indicator) screener meets with NHTSA Specifications for ABI devices. Blow into the mouthpiece and get an accurate estimate of your BAC in seconds."

If you have to ask you probably shouldn't be driving. Drunk driving is really bad... really really bad. Call a friend, sleep it off, or whatever, but maybe making a plan before getting drunk would be a good idea. I can't get over movie stars and rich people (Paris Hilton, Lindsey Lohan) who drive drunk. These people spend money on clothes for their dogs but they will not pay a driver (or a cab) to take them home after a night on the town. Maybe they should work a sober ride home into their deals that they make when they get paid $15,000 to make a 3 hour stop at a bar and get fed free drinks all night long. Take the $119.95 and go buy yourself a few extra drinks and a ride home.

4. The Flying Alarm Clock. "This digital alarm clock launches a rotor into the air that flies around the room as the alarm sounds, hovering up to 9' in the air, and will not cease ringing until the rotor is returned to the alarm clock base, compelling even the most stubborn sleepers to get out of bed on time..."

I, personally, have never been a fan of the snooze button. To this day I don't understand how it works. I know that once you push it, your alarm will go off at a later time, but to me that is goofy... why not just set the alarm for the time you plan to get up. For a person to have to chase a flying rotor is ridiculous. If you have high ceilings, you would maybe have to get out a ladder to retrieve the dumb thing. I had a few roommates in college that swore by their snooze button (you know who you are) and it drove me crazy. Their alarms would start going off an hour before they actually woke up and who can sleep through all that racket?

5. The Runaway Alarm Clock. "This is the alarm clock that rolls away and hides when you hit its snooze button..."

Same idea as the flying one. The only good thing about this one is that it might get a person to clean out whatever is under their bed so that the dumb thing can go all the way under the bed.

6. Pop-up Hot Dog Cooker. "Like a pop-up toaster, this unique kitchen appliance prepares two hot dogs and buns in minutes..."

I don't know about you, but I have a microwave. That, and, I don't have enough room for a separate gadget to cook my hot dogs (not that I eat meat anyway... I call mine not-dogs and I haven't been able to stomach them since I was pregnancy with Burbles).

7. Keep Leftover chicken wing bones out of site. "Bones belong in a museum, not on your plate. So when it is time to watch the big game, the SnacDaddy serving tray lets you eat chicken wings while hiding the bones..."

OK, so I don't like bones or skin when I eat anything (ask Fundi... they always end up on his plate), but this is going a little too far. Just throw the bones in the garbage, geez. I don't know anyone so stuffy that they are above using a garbage can.

8. License Plate Frame Scrolls Personalized Messages. "Express yourself on the road! This sleek license plate frame has a built in scrolling message display..."

Can we say... Accident waiting to happen? Are personalized license plates not enough? Now we need to put tiny type scrolling across the license plate holder? While I would never get one of these myself, I am a sucker for reading what is on bumper stickers and I'm sure this would be no different... if only I can get closer to read what that says.

SO COOL Gadgets:

1. The Voice Recognition Grocery List Organizer. "This is the voice activated grocery list organizer that comes pre-loaded with over 2500 food, beverage, household, beauty, and office items and recognizes words as specific as swordfish, emery boards, and lawn bags, allowing you to store and print shopping lists simply by speaking the name of the item... You can also add items to the organizer's database--up to a maximum of 5000 items..."

The $149.95 would buy a whole lot of paper, but I am such a list maker that I would have such fun with this. The trick would be remembering to take the printed list with me. They don't have an invention to help me remember that.

2. The Personal Note-taker QuickLink-Pen Elite. "This electronic highlighter that stores up to 1000 pages of text! Scan sentences or paragraphs - store the pen and later upload to PC, PDA or Smartphone..."

Wow. I definitely would have saved a lot of time in college had I had me one of these. I am such a slow writer. Even today, I like to keep articles and little bits of paper around that have web-sites that I need to look at. Having this would save me from the piles of loose paper I sometimes end up with.

3. Create MP3s From Your Old Audio Cassette Tapes! "Bust out those Fleetwood Mac, Allman Brothers and Deep Purple cassette tapes and convert them into MP3 audio files..."

I wish I hadn't thrown out all my beloved cassette tapes. I had so many good ones... Vanilla Ice, Bart Simpson, MC Hammer to name a few. Supposedly this makes 25 cassette tapes fit onto one CD. Good Grief.

4. Cure Snorkel-Panic! and Catch Snorkel Fever... "Introducing Kapitol Reef, the world's most advanced and amazing dry snorkel. This physician-invented snorkel will make your breathing under water a complete pleasure..."

I think I should try this. If you have been reading, you know that I am not a snorkeler by nature, but I may be able to learn. There are obviously gadgets and gizmos for everything. I don't know if anything is out there that will teach me to not mind the taste of salt-water.

The cool list could go on and on. I really liked the table aquariums, photo frame aquariums, and 15 language translator with voice translations as well. Anyone else know of cool or absurd gadgets and gizmos? What is your opinion?